Don’t Be A Bore…
One magical way to be the most interesting person out there.
Have you ever been cornered by someone who prattles on and on about themselves? Even if Ed Sheeran himself talked to you for a half hour about his tremendous accomplishments and never inquired as to your own, I’d wager you’d come away from that thinking Ed Sheeran, talented though he is, was an incredibly arrogant bore.
Why is Keanue Reeves so admired? Because the actor keeps a very low profile, helps out others, and is wonderfully humble. The man does not tell people he needs only blue M&Ms and Neil Young playing softly in his trailer or a green room before he’ll sign that contract. Keanu is the antithesis of most “stars”, and we like him. He focuses on others.
Ah, that’s the well-known secret that’s difficult to place into practice. Listen to others. A lot. Focus on them.
Have you ever attempted to listen to your wife, friend, or an acquaintance at a party? Don’t you want to let them know you just ran your 39th marathon, made partner (finally, but who’s to say it took that long), or you bought a home in that desireable neighborhood? Dont you want to show your partner how right you are and how wrong they are (again)? Don’t.
Wait to be asked a question, and if it comes, be succinct. Don’t endlessly talk about your favorite subject (you). Be Keanu and focus on finding out more about the person in front of you. People who listen are rare and loved, because we live in a loud world where Instagram is made for boasting. Don’t do it.
Listen and ask questions about that person. You will be considered a wonderful conversationalist.
I think people who listen have to practice it for years before it becomes their default setting. You and I have to keep working at active listening. Make it your goal to ask at least one question about the person next to you going on and on about their favorite bourbon or soccer team. If the person is a clam and won’t open up, move on to the next person who loves to talk about their favorite subject.
You’ve known this secret for years, but it is difficult to put into practice, but if you’re willing to keep at it you’ll be admired and liked. You’ll be considered fascinating. This world needs quieter people. This world needs kind people who really want to listen to others. You might learn something along the way.
I’m going to start listening a lot more starting now. My husband will laugh as he reads this, because I cut him off all the time. Let’s keep in touch over listening. I’ll ask you about you and how it’s going, and you can keep me accountable, too.
Now go out there and be fascinating.
