How to Be Happy
How to find moments or hours of blissful happiness almost any day…
You can be pointed in the direction of happiness, but unless you’re ready to embrace it and own it, you’re not going to feel the bliss and joy of a moment, an hour or a day. I’ll write my own thoughts down on how to get to a good place in your mind, but this journey is up to you. Choose to be more easygoing than you are. Choose to look at the pretty sitting next to the absolute ugly. It is a choice.
While flying yesterday I could have felt miffed at the mask mandate, at not having any beverage service or a decent gluten-free snack, but what would that accomplish? My whining over small things gets me nowhere, and it would irritate the others around me. So I wore my mask, drank my own water and read a book. The time flew by along with the shifting landscape far below me, and I made great progress on a book I think I’ve read before.
Then I popped onto online news about how rude people are in restaurants, shopping in general, and beating up innocent people in broad daylight. Craziness! Everyone needs to understand they are one of seven and a half billion humans living on this planet, so we need to settle down, wait our turn, and be plain old nice.
Why not be nice to whomever you come into contact with today and tomorrow and the day after? Let’s come out of this pandemic being kinder even if we have to fake it at first. Happiness is better when it is shared. And I’ve done my share of serving at restaurants. It’s a tough job, and nobody ever “taught me a lesson” by leaving eight pennies as a tip. The tables that did leave a tip were usually the unassuming people. They could wait for their drink order. They made me smile as I set their dinners down in front of them.
Maybe we need to smile more. Maybe we need to practice smiling again, since our mouths have been covered for the past fifteen months.
This current happiness for me began the moment we stepped on the plane, heading to Amish country in Pennsylvania. Today was lovely. The weather felt cooler than it’s been with a breeze blowing the leaves around. We had plans to go to Lititz, and I left my dad and my husband to find some beer at various pubs while I had the pleasure of shopping for small treasures to bring home. I’m a sucker for candles and could have bought another five at least, but my candle collection now numbers close to seventy or so. Candles were out, but I still found other beautiful little splurges to pack in my luggage.
Soaps for autumn, loose tea from the tea shop that now has a beautiful tea room decorated in bright colors with plump pillows on the window seats, and delicate teapots set out with matching vintage teacups. I took an herbal tea to go, because the number of shops has increased. I had many stops to make, and I managed to find some hand made wooden cheese spreaders along with hand carved wooden bowls. The chocolate shop offered the most amazing dark chocolate turtles I’ve ever eaten (I did share one with my husband tonight).
Then I stumbled across a shop that looked as if Joanna Gaines had fixed it up herself. She’s only a decorating genius, and I longed to buy the highly textured pillows along with the dried grasses. I settled on some incense with a lovely brass holder and one candle. One! I shopped until the stores closed, and then I found the guys and we had the best pub-style dinner. Bangers and mash, shepherd’s pie and huge french fies. I drank more tea while they found some pale ales. I was the designated driver, and this arrangement worked for me just fine. I got to shop while they sampled beers. I’m happy with the deal.
I shopped alone, because my mom can’t manage the steps any longer, and both daughters could not come out here. But choosing to be happy shopping alone worked out just fine. Dwell on the good and shut away the bad. It works! I bought a few small gifts for the kids, but mainly I just looked. Okay, that one shop that was part goth and part vintage begged to be discovered and I found some really cool gifts for Christmas. I thought of my daughter who loved that shop when she came out for a visit just months ahead of the pandemic shutdown. I missed both girls. But…
I chose to be happy. I chose to stay downstairs and watch a really excellent movie tonight with the guys before I went upstairs and asked mom lots of questions about her life. I chose to spend time with my mom and dad, because I’m want to. It’s why I’m here. To connect with everyone. No drama. No fights. Just people choosing to be easygoing about their time. We’re together again, and it’s a good thing.
Happiness is walking outside on a workday when it’s midsummer and the world is in bloom. It’s enjoying the cold iced tea while chatting with shop owners. It’s ignoring the fatigue that is a constant reminder to me. The pain in my joints that worsens when I travel. But I still swept off my mom’s whole back deck and the stepping stones, and I’ll hang out with my little brother tomorrow, since we share a love of Starbucks. I didn’t get my fix today, so I think I’ll have two drinks tomorrow. Then it’s off to visit the small towns where the Amish and Mennonite choose to live.
How about you? Can you choose to talk to family? To be a part of their lives? I drew the line at seeing the Oak Ridge Boys tomorrow, but it will be good to have the car for hours in the afternoon. I’ll get some one-on-one time with my husband, and that’s the sweetest gift of all. We have fun together, as we just follow the back roads until we are thoroughly lost and standing in front of a makeshift Amish farmer’s market where we’ll buy tomatoes and blueberry pie.
I know. It’s easy to be happy when visiting family, but the real world we left four hundred miles away still makes itself known. I still have children who call with questions, and my husband’s work needs him on any given day; so we work through the problems that arise and settle down to some peace, tranquility, and rest; and we choose to take time and talk to my family. In the end it is the people in our lives who matter. Being nice to them, helping them out. Talking to them over the best oatmeal cookies I’ve ever had. We chose to visit. We chose to show them how much they matter, and that makes us all very happy.
Get through your work and head home to revel in summer. Pick fresh zucchini from the garden or just basil if that’s all the room your have and eat it. Visit your family and ask for stories, because that’s what is passed down. Give of your time, and happiness is sure to follow.
We who are blessed enough to have family are blissed out. Choose to see the good. Choose it today. Right now. That cubicle? It’s not half bad, and some of your coworkers want to be your work friend. Your neighbor wants to chat for a minute. People want your attention. Give them happiness. Well, I suppose you can’t control that part, but you can take care of you. Let today be the day where you do one thing to be a nicer person. Happiness cant’t be far behind.
And oh! I have more royal news to pass on. Tomrrow….
