Make It All About You…
But I just wrote about helping others! What gives?
We’re living with fear, sickness, discord, unkindness, inflation, and uncertainty and we need to take a personal time-out. Except, we can’t. Here’s what we do next…
Many of us disagree on how to handle the ongoing two year old pandemic, and it’s affecting the planet. I will be open about my life. I didn’t want to catch and die of Covid, and I have untreated lupus so at first I just did grocery shopping and bought masks on ebay. I stayed at home.
Our worlds and patterns changed from normal life. We worked from home, kids as young as two were masked, we didn’t have weddings, parties, and we stopped dining out, and having our haircut. It all stopped. Life was weird.
Now, with two years of disruption under our belts, many people are giving the rules and the pandemic a middle finger and going out and living again. I’ll say this much. I live in a place that is both liberal and conservative. People still have the groceries delivered and don’t go leave home. They don’t dine out. They stay away from crowds.
Others are enjoying air travel, even if the options are limited. I fly home to see family, and I like being in an almost empty movie theater. The regular theater masks us and we sit on top of each other, so that’s interesting. I adore the no contact option on food delivery. I’m currently having a love affair with Jersey Mike’s turkey subs that are dropped on my porch. I tip well, in case someone wants to spit in my food, and I hope that makes them less likely to do so. But it’s the introverts who love this life of less contact.
Actually, even the introverts want some normal back. All of us have been affected. How do we take care of ourselves in uncertain times?
Having a commune of people around you helps. Not physically, though if that’s an option and you like the group, then go for it! Having like-minded people in your clique helps. If you can visit with someone, I think it makes you happier. We need security, love, and assurance that we’re going to be alright.
Taking time to do what we enjoy is necessary. Sure, there’s the job needed to buy the groceries that are more expensive than ever. But after work, there is some time to read, walk, think, play music, play the piano, draw, FaceTime, build furniture, or take a long hot shower, even if it does dry out the skin.
We need touch. Hugs. From your group. I hug my family and my sons-in-law are cool with that. Get a hug. And if you can’t get one in person, then go online and ask for a virtual hug. People do need people. My elderly mom and I had massages together, and we both felt better afterward. My mother lives in a body riddled with pain, and she essentially lives in one room of her large home. Dad asked me to find out what it wrong with her, since she’s lost her will to live. She’s lost so much weight since I last saw her.
Turns out my mother is depressed because of the constant pain. Getting her out of the house for a massage in a chair was a godsend! My brother lives in their city, and when we went out for lunch he asked what he could do to help. I asked him to take mom and dad out for dinner once a week. In spite of Covid, and my parents are fine with it. I’ll be flying out a lot more often, and I suppose this is that time in my life when I’m stretched between grandchildren, children and parents. But people need other people. Even introverts. Maybe especially them.
Are you seeing family?
Why are so many people estranged from their families? Can’t we all be different and love? Can we reach out and try?
I have family that opposes some things I believe, so I reach out and accept. I love them, and we meet each other on common ground. Even if it was the dream of the Packers going to the Super Bowl this year. Even if it is about having Christmas two days in a row, because someone had to work on Christmas Day proper. (She’s a nurse, and I’m the proud momma!)
Reach out to your tribe (which might be your family), and if you don’t have one, make one. Keep reaching. You’ll find people. We are all over the place waiting to connect.
As for more self-care, do that one thing that makes you lose track of time. Nothing harmful like heroin or binge drinking. I’m writing about you taking up that long ago talent for drawing. Wood carving. Writing. Learning a song on your dusty piano. What do you do that makes you forget about everything else? Do it!!
We will never have another time in history where we have so much time in our homes, our space, our room. You do have a talent. We all do. We might not reach superstar heights of fame and glory, but leading a plain, simple life is beautiful. So immerse yourself in that thing that makes you look up at the clock in amazement. Two hours flew by, and we forgot about the clock. We forgot the time. The busyness. Forgot the edgy, crazy world.
We have the time to learn how to cook healthy. I cooked for forty years and gave it up for the most part. I’m a baker, but it’s just me and my husband rattling around the house, so we don’t need brownies and cakes staring at us all week. I wish. But soups and smoothies? Go for it.
Can I just say this? Please don’t go down the path of addiction. It runs in my family, and it’s all around me. Don’t even start. I’m begging you. Stay off that sad path.
My aunt used to drink all night and day, and I’d sit in a chair with my legs tucked up and out of the way in the makeshift hallway that was a kitchen, and she’d chase him through the four rooms with a cast iron frying pan. Good thing my cousin was quick. Nobody sets out to be an addict. Not even my aunt, who lost the ability to speak due to her impaired brain. Be healthy.
Step out and take yourself to a movie. I love the royals, so I’m watching one documentary on Princess Diana. Did you watch the one called Magnus? The kid who started playing chess at age four? Inspiration right on YouTube. Yes, it might sound dull, but it is absolutely captivating.
I’ll end with this. We all have a spiritual side. It needs to be nurtured for us to feel fulfilled. I’m into Jesus. Just a hippie Jesus freak who thinks he knows the answers. I also swear like a sailor, but I have been instructed by an editor that my swearing should not appear in print.
Find your beliefs, tap into the spirit inside you. We draw strength from that place, that hole in the middle of us that needs filling. Read up and journal. Go to a book study. Seek. Walk the path. Think. Feel.
I believe we are going to come out of this time (pandemic) stronger than before. We will find ourselves and meet the new world with courage, kindness and love. Let’s start with ourselves.
PS. I’ll be writing a bit on my crazy upbringing. Not mom and dad. They were fine people who dabbled in belly-dancing and had Mardi Gras parties on Fat Tuesday. That’s normal. Wait until I show you the craziness. You just might laugh a bit.
Stay strong. Find peace.
